i'm sorry to report that a time when admins are needed most, i will be stepping away from the hl2 team
you guys need to know who you can depend on creatively and i think it would be disingenuous to pretend as if i could be counted on in this way. it's underhanded to withdraw at a time when the stakes are high and contribution is critical for the server's health and stability but i would rather take some time apart than to go behind your back. i'd really rather slap you in the face than stab you in the back.
i'm truly ashamed to say to my friends and colleagues that i cannot be depended upon to assist them at this time help is most needed. truthfully, i do not currently have much creative interest and what little i do is intrigued towards other projects and pursuits that i find myself dedicating my time and passion towards
i have found my personal performance on the team disappointing and beneath my standards - of course i always try to do what is right and best and sometimes that means you must go out on a limb and take risks to push the envelope, but currently i do not believe i am elevating the team.
that said, this is and hopefully will continue to be the best community in gmod roleplay and unironically, perhaps one of the best in general. i have made some friends for life here and always look fondly on the lessons i have learned from the community at large and the experiences we have shared. i have the utmost respect and appreciation for my colleagues who continue to put food on the table for our hl2 server and i cannot express that enough. this is also why i feel that i've been wearing something of a false crown, atleast with regards to my creative and administrative contributions.
to my colleagues, it has been an honor! thank you for taking a risk on giving me a badge - from the top looking down, i figure you must feel a sense of regret when your expectations and standards are not met. the opportunity has been precious and flattering and i hope that one day i can do the role justice if ever the opportunity falls in my lap again.
unfortunately, i'm not the person the server needs at the helm right now and hope that this will pressure the people with the interest and ability to take up the tools i will be leaving behind to deliver the experience i cannot.
i can only hope this inspires you, reader, to rise to the occasion and support the server but it's hard to know whether i am jumping ship or breaking up and only time will tell if i've helped kill something i helped create.
thank you for letting me administrate for you!
your friend, shkwambo
i know the smiths are sadcringe but this is scrambleposting and they're GOOD, okay?